Day 11 Trailing Back Arrival in Alexandria

Two days ago we arrived to our new home. We arrived on a welcoming crisp and sunny day. Forgive my late entry ~ the experience has been overwhelming in so many ways and I have not found the time or the focus to write.

We arrived to a wonderful greeting ~ daughter, son-in-law, both dogs telling us "we are so happy you are here" (both in words and tail wagging). We also arrived to total chaos of boxes and furniture and the beginnings of melding two households. We did very little unpacking that first day. It was a time of just being together after all the months of planning and waiting.

Yesterday we started to unpack in earnest. There were so many boxes we couldn't access the kitchen so it was a necessity. Hilary said "did you get rid of anything?" She was right to ask; there was just so much stuff that needed to find places in a home designed for one family not two. We did get rid of a lot with both the move from Palo Alto and from Santa Clara but after 36 years together... Thomas and I are not pack rats. We did not think we owned an absurd amount of stuff but looking at and unpacking all those boxes, well, the evidence does not lie. It just seems like the perfect metaphor. We just could not bear to leave our old life behind so we brought it with us. The existential dilemma.

How do I feel? Exactly as I thought there are a panoply of emotions. After all those months of anticipation we are finally here. It reminds me so much of having a baby. For months you anticipate the arrival of something that feels so exciting in many ways and you know your life will be changed forever. You want that but you have no idea that sometimes, in your emotional and physical exhaustion, you just want to go back to the calmness of the life you knew so well. Two days in it is all so new; everything about it is so new. I feel like I just threw all my cards in the air and I will have to see how they land.

We were on the road for eleven days and have been here less than 48 hours. The human mind is so interesting when it is on overload. It feels so long ago that we said good-bye and I hardly remember the days of travel. Because we drove we did not need to get used to changing time zones; it was gradual like a slow boil. I think if we had flown here the radical shift would have felt more startling. I don't know which is better ~ pull the band aid off quickly or carefully peel it. It doesn't really matter. Same effect, different experience.

On Wednesday we both go back to work which will be grounding in so many ways. We have both been working remotely for so long that it matters not where we are sitting ~ the work remains the same. For Thomas it will be much easier in many ways because he had to sync up his schedule for meeting times in Germany and Boston. Now at least he is in one of the same time zones. For me, it will only be slightly challenging as I need to find times that work for my clients without requiring me to work so late at night. Hilary taught me how to set up my google calendar so that I can see both time zones; that will help with the inevitable confusion of "my time or yours".

I am going to continue my blog which makes me feel connected to all of you, but it will be less frequent. I need that connection as I construct this new life. I will likely focus it around new experiences; for example, next week-end we are hoping to go for a hike in Shenandoah National Park which is only an hour away from us. Before it gets too cold, we are hoping for some bike rides into DC and around the Alexandria neighborhoods. And once again, Thomas and I are going to train to run a 5K with Kiel and Hilary in February. We are so excited to celebrate Christmas with our family instead of from afar. On December 26 we will drive to Connecticut to spend a week with Kiel, Carly and Tala. I am not forgetting that this is the reason we threw the cards in the air.

And let me end this post with expressing my gratitude to all of you for your support and love through this transition. Really, it would have been so lonely without you.