crab

1. any of an infraorder (Brachyura) with a short broad usually flattened carapace, a small abdomen that curls forward beneath the body, short antennae, and the anterior pair of limbs modified as grasping pincers

2. an ill-tempered person : grouch

(Merriam-Webster, 2021)

In my never ending quest to find the sweet spot of my new home we took a week-end trip to the beloved eastern shore of Maryland. That's what they call the beach here ~ the shore. We stayed at a B & B in Chestertown, a town as charming as its name. Thomas and I drove up the shore visiting equally charming towns along the way and landing in a little place at the very northern end of the Chesapeake Bay where everyone sounded like Mare of Easttown. We had crab cake sandwiches for lunch while we watched the local Marylanders boating on the bay. The weather was beautiful (i.e. no rain) and the humidity made my skin glow and my hair curl.

The next day Hilary, Nate and the dogs joined us. We drove out to the actual shore and Hilary swam in the Chesapeake while Lucy (black lab) swam out to "save" her and Boss (malamute) laid miserably in the hot dirt wishing for winter to return. Or at least that is how I anthropomorphised the situation.

On Sunday we drove home stopping in Annapolis ~the capital of Maryland ~ for a crab lunch. You can't go to the shore in Maryland without eating crab. It's like going to Maine and not having lobster or going to San Francisco and not eating your clam chowder out of a sourdough bowl. I had a Caesar salad with a crab cake, Nate had a crab cake sandwich, Thomas had fish and chips (he always has fish and chips) and Hilary ordered a half dozen crabs. The waiter asked what size? Extra small, small, medium, large, extra large, "today we have all sizes", he said. Hilary responded with "medium", her voice full of confidence that she knew exactly what she was getting. Turns out that is a lot of Maryland Blue Crab (or crab as they just call it here).

It was delicious but it was different. And there is that theme again. The Maryland shore is beautiful but it is different. The Atlantic Ocean is majestic in its own way but it is different. DC is a gorgeous city but it is so very different from San Francisco, an equally gorgeous city.

I am out of the sad and sentimental mood that I expressed in my last blog post. Now I am just crabby that I can't seem to have everything I want ~ such a first world problem. I am even annoyed that I can't seem to do the five stages of grief in the right order! (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance) I thought once I felt all that sadness about missing my life, my friends, my family in California, I would move quickly into acceptance. There is no quickly here. This is a process that is taking its due time. And now, as I write that, I feel myself slipping into a bit of acceptance. I had a hard choice to make and I do not regret it. So far life has been full of either/or; why would I think it will be any different now?

It turns out that it is possible to find dungeness crab and Maryland blue crab equally delicious. What luck that I get to have both of those tasty experiences in my life.